October 6, 2008
By bigbrother ~ October 6th, 2008. Filed under: Daily Communique.
Good morning Team of Mavericks,
What you need to know today:
With economic catastrophe postponed by timely and wise intervention of the United States Congress, Big Brother turns an eminent gaze to the other high profile piracy and hostage-taking in an inflationary failed state. Pirates operating in the Indian Ocean off the coast of Somalia have held a Ukrainian ship, the MV Faina, and its crew for 12 days. Since piracy is the largest sector of the Somali economy, such routine happenings would not normally warrant attention of the Main Stream Media. However, this time the pirates hit jackpot as the MV Faina ‘s cargo is $30 million of Russian tanks and sundry weapons bound for the African interior and unquestionably predestined for use with only pure intentions.
American and Russian warships, in an increasingly rare agreement of purpose, have the wayward MV Faina and each other in sight right against the boundary of Somalia’s territorial waters while the brigands brazen it out within said boundary, patiently negotiating a $20 million ransom. Big Brother leaves you to speculate on the ultimate dispensation of the weaponry and predicts that this will not end well for either pirate or hostage.
Also, Wells Fargo (Ben Braddock), tries to prevent the shotgun wedding of Wachovia (Bristol Palin) to Citigroup. Tonight, the role of Mrs. Robinson will be played by the FDIC.
Someone you need to know today:
William C. Ayers (b.1944), American bomb-thrower and typical liberal college professor, co-founded radical Weather Underground in the 1960’s. Ayers indoctrinated his young ward, Blacky Obamuslim, who due to naiveté, lack of experience, and poor upbringing in a single parent household, enthusiastically took up “The Cause” by going to Harvard Law School and becoming a “Community Organizer”. “The Goal” is in sight as Blacky can finally bring down the hated establishment from the inside with his imminent election to the highest office in the land. Or something like that.
Today’s Sports AND Gossip:
O.J. Simpson was convicted of armed robbery, kidnapping, double parking and failing to cover his marker in Las Vegas on Friday. However, he still got away with murder. You get a taste. NOW GET BACK TO WORK.
Read a Book:
(if) I DID IT: Confession of The Killer by Orenthal James Simpson. Tells the riveting hypothetical story of how a HOF running back with arthritic knees could have possibly allegedly brutally murdered two people even though he had no motive. You will not feel GUILTY buying this book because the proceeds go to the real owner of O.J.’s memorabilia.
That is all,
Big Brother
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